Yesterday, I had one of my infamous house-related freakouts. The holidays make me miss my RV’ing parents something wicked, and that unhappiness is multiplied by the stress of shopping, decorating, cooking, and cleaning for three weeks straight. Then, suddenly the big day is over and there’s nothing fun to look forward. Top that all off with a heavy dose of rain(!), then sit me in the middle of a gutted bathroom with a drill and a short fuse. 3…2…1…. meltdown.
Teague and I both had the day off, so in my mind we were going to use this lovely chunk of free time to make some major progress on the bathroom. But we slept in late, dawdled over coffee, and had to run some errands. Noon came and went, and we still hadn’t touched anything. I started to ask what the “next steps” were, and what I could tackle right away. The underlying message was: “Right now, this very minute, we must start doing something productive. Hurry, before I snap!”
When we were still futzing a few hours later, I started to babble about making “forward movement” and “noticeable progress” – two terms I abuse when we’re being sluggish and I want us to work faster. It’s not very motivational, but it’s all I ever seem to muster. I was close to tears over a drywall screw that punched through the paper. I ranted to poor Teague about how we needed the bathroom finished so we could take a break from living in utter filth for a few weeks. All I really wanted to do was call it quits, find a nice clean bedroom in someone else’s house, and take a nap.
The problem was, neither of us had much energy to devote to the house. We weren’t in the zone. And on days like that, no matter how badly I wish for a big surge of motivation, it never seems to come. So we worked, but slowly and without enjoyment. A few pieces of drywall went up, and some shop-vac’ing occured. Little else came of it, and I wasted the entire day being pissed off and frustrated when I should have just let it go and watched some HGTV in my pajamas.
Ah well…….
Now that I’m feeling less like the Grinch and more like myself, I’m back in the game. I just spent a good chunk of time surfing over at Architectural Depot’s website, daydreaming about how cool the bathroom would look with some wainscoting, decorative moulding, and a tin tile ceiling. I’m thoroughly impressed with this site – they have some really unique products I haven’t seen elsewhere to “do it up right” – like these pretty stair brackets, and all sorts of fancy onlays and appliques. You could go nuts with this stuff!
Check it out for yourself:
Comments, Thoughts, and Feedback
Good morning, Mindy. Take it from someone who is now separated…take some time for the two of you! One’s own misery is futile enough; sitting in a puddle on the floor while sharing it with someone else only lends itself to an entire house of misery.
Pack up, go to a B&B, make love all night, and talk endlessly about your futures all day! Do that once every 6-8 weeks and the house will be in its rightful place… complementing a wonderful marriage!
All in love,
Maria
Maria,
I’m sorry to hear about your seperation, and hope you’re doing well. Looks like you have a cute dog to keep you company, at least.
I appreciate the advice and kind words. We’ve made a point of slowing down this past year and squeezing in time for things we enjoy. The first year, we did nothing BUT work! We still have a ways to go to balance it all out, but at least we’re trying, right?
I’ve always been a “do it all” kinda girl, but I’m learning to delegate and say no a bit more. Relaxing does not really come natural to me, but I’m working on that too ;)
Mindy- I can really relate to this. Steve and I both push ourselves very hard at our job-jobs and at home. I have faith you will get over this “hump”. I understand how hard it can be to “do nothing” or “make no progress” when one is dying to complete a project. At times like that, I hate hearing “life is a process”, but I know it’s true.
Steve and I just got back from a vacation and while it didn’t entirely convert us to a life of R&R, it did mellow us a bit.
We have those periods where we aren’t “in the zone” too, but they are usually followed by a period of high energy and motivation. We all need breaks it seems.
Thanks for reminding me of that and keep up the great work on your beautiful home.
Wow! I could have written that post! I just read it and then reread it to my husband and he agreed – I could have written it! Thanks for making me feel normal… sometimes I feel like I live in a renovation “bubble”.
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